A couple of weeks ago, I was so bored of boys that I switched my Tinder ‘discovery preference’ to females. No prior thought was put into the decision; I just did it. So, although I’ve never done more than kiss a girl, I do think they’re amazing. Girls are just better to look at. They have a way of being simultaneously delicate and strong, chaste and coquettish, and you can empathise with them in a way that you can’t with men.
I think I went in to it with romanticised expectations of connecting on deeper levels and actually being able to have conversations with like-minded women, as opposed to wading through the shit that men tend to spew. I was wrong. So wrong.
Here are some things that I have
learnt grossly generalised about the lady loving ladies of Tinder –
- They are not afraid to show you their boobs, two messages in.
- They are not afraid to ask to see your boobs, two messages in.
- They love straight girls. Direct quote – ‘I love straight girls‘.
- Asian girls are always shocked to find another Asian girl. Every. Single. Time.
- They like to ask if you’ve ‘been with a lot of guys‘.
- They want to show you ‘how to lick pussy‘. Apparently it’s different when a girl does it.
- They have no problem getting naked on those stupid Tinder ‘moments’ that ALL your matches can see for 24 hours.
- They want to sext. All. The. Time.
- Tattoos and piercings are a big thing.
- 80% are super sporty.
Here is what I learnt about myself from flirting with fannies –
- I am 100% more likely to show my boobs to a girl than a boy. Because that’s what happened.
- I literally think eyebrows are everything. But I already knew that.
- I’m essentially attracted to hotter versions of myself. Basically, Esmeralda.
- I have no problem telling anyone that I want to sit on their face.
- I think sexting is really dull.
- I would rather look at boobs than a dick pic.
- I would rather look at a dick pic than a pussy pic.
- Other people’s vaginas make me wonder about my own.
Considering that two boys are currently trying to ask me out on dates and all the girls only want to talk about putting their tongues in unmentionable places, as opposed to actually doing it, girl-on-girl action does not seem to be on the cards. For now, at least. Disappointing, or what?
Ladies, have you experienced other girls on some kind of dating platform? Fellas, does your experience of girls differ greatly?