Snapchat Relapse

It’s no great secret that boys never really, truly let you go. Even when you think you’re out of their douchey, lying clutches, they claw you back in. They want to ensure that they are always on your mind. After all, no one likes to be forgotten. This happened to me last night when I got a snapchat from W. Now, he still snapchats me fairly regularly, and when I am tired or not really thinking about it, I slip up and reply. At the end of the day, it’s only snapchat, right? What’s the worst that could happen?

Last night, however, we had a full blown snapchat conversation. It was just so natural and easy to do, I hated him even more for taking such a good friendship away from me. At one point he tried to move the chat to whatsapp, but when I failed to reply, probably realised that snapchat was the only relapse loophole I was allowing myself.

My personal favourite was a snapchat of my Winnie the Pooh teddy with the caption ‘dumb enough to get stuck in the honey trap‘. Hilarious, right? Couldn’t think of a more apt metaphor. Of course it quickly devolved into snapchats about banging. Because I’m an idiot. I tried to stay on the offensive as much as possible; he said bitchy doesn’t suit me. Apparently I can be a cunt, but not a bitch. Can someone explain that to me, please?

Over two hours later, the conversation ended with a snapchat captioned ‘relapse over‘. I knew I was stupid for having played along, but I felt relatively okay about it. Then this morning, due to unrelated events, I almost cried. I’ve literally cried once in the last 15 years. I really wanted to talk to him afterwards. Not even about it, because that’s just not something I do, but because I knew he would make me feel better. I would say anything, he would say something offensive – I would feel warm and nostalgic and like all was right with the world again.

What is wrong with me?


10 thoughts on “Snapchat Relapse

  1. AH! I get this all the time–guys relapsing. I know it’s easy to fall back into conversation, and you obviously have serious feelings for this one if you cry about it. But I just have to say this: Don’t ever do that again! Two reasons: 1. He’s called you a cunt!?!? (Uhg, I’ve never said that word outloud, and it’s difficult enough to type it.) That is in no way, shape, or form how to you talk to someone you care about. 2. He actually sent “Relapse over.” That guy is a horrible person. He knew what he was doing the whole time, and he obviously doesn’t respect your feelings!

    You deserve so much better!

    • Maybe I didn’t write it too clearly, haha. The crying wasn’t about him and I sent ‘relapse over’, but other than that you’re completely right! He’s a massive bellend. I’m just weak haha

      • Ohhh! Well, I hadn’t finished my first cup of coffee for the morning when I read your post either. I’m glad you sent “relapse over!” Whew! We’re all a little weak. That’s what makes us women 🙂

        By the way, I just looked up “bellend.” We don’t use that term in the US. It’s an excellent word that has now been added to my voacabulary!

      • Oops, I butchered vocabulary up there. We don’t use wanker here either, but I’m familiar with that one through British comedies.

        For some reason, the South doesn’t have many penis insults. I wish we did! Ours come in similes: ugly as sin, fat as a tick, dumb as dirt, slicker than a pig… The list goes on.

  2. Pingback: Snapchat Antagonism | Tackling Your Twenties Gracelessly

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